29 June 2007

let us go hence;

I've always thought of myself as a multi-tasker, and yes, I can hold a conversation and type at the same time (fast and accurately to boot!) but when it comes to real, actual focused attention, like, oh say, the subject I'm throwing myself into to become an authority (even if only to myself because I only care that *I* know what I'm trying to know, not whether anyone else knows if I do or do not know said subject) then I do indeed face a bit of a problem. I don't love my children equally, see. One is cute, the other is striking. One is funny, the other serious. One cat is fat and snuggly, the other likes a bit of rough love.

And so it is with pursuits of the mind. I'm completely caught up in the autism (would be trial of the century) vaccine debate currently being argued in DC Claims.

The subject of autism is hardly new to me, but never have I been one to voraciously consume, on a daily basis, any and all information pertaining to it... until now. ^_^

Whether or not I'm Aspergian could be up for debate, but re the last parenthetical aside above, I'm primarily interested in knowing that *I* am happy with what I know; I don't care if anyone else concurs or not. Well, perhaps if they completely disagreed I'd be interested in hearing why, but only if they had a good, sound argument. =P On the other hand, Chairwoman D said fairly tersely, when I asked if she'd read the Asperger's documentation that I'd sent her, that yes, much of it did sound quite like me. It was only moments later that she refused to look at me any longer and gave me the finger with both hands. Now, lest you think she's being vulgar, in our household that's short for 'I love you, you asshole'. I think she was calling me a pedantic asshole, but as she didn't say so explicitly, I couldn't testify to it.

As for the autism versus vaccine debate... I'm not turning this into an autism blog (but good lord, can I get back to the poetry?) really, but I have to ponder via keypad somewhere because really, no one I know has any knowledge whatsoever of either side and when I mention it (very, very careful not to launch into monologue, but oh god, it's hard!) they sort of nod and 'ahh. oh. really? uh-huh. So is that file done yet?'

There is mention of the absence of adults with autism on the other side of the fence. In my first readings (where I was very much new to the fierce nature of the debate) I wondered 'haven't they seen Rainman?' And what about that guy that was non-verbal yet imitated blues musicians so well he could hardly be told apart from them? I remember that from when I was in school. He'd have to be... oh... 50+ at least. And he wasn't the only autistic man around in the mid-90s.

My next personal query came at the idea that there really is no autism, just mercury poisoning that is mis-diagnosed. Now, call me an armchair hack, but, this is the group I want to see: the elders suffering mercury poisoning that show symptoms of autism. Where are they? If that's what autism really is, mere mercury poisoning, then where are the adults with mercury poisoning by autism proxy? MPAP. There, I've just invented a new syndrome. Call me Dr Anactoria, please.

Last but not least, I finally got move and it is BLESSFULLY quiet. I can come home and sit in complete silence (well, it is a flat, so some sounds occur, but not the State Finals tumbling and wrestling match sounds that I used to hear.) Of course, now that I'm on the top, I'm paranoid about making noise and the steps that go into the living room? There IS no silent spot. They are ALL squeaky spots. ugh.

Right now I hear crickets and they are driving me mad, but that's partially because I have a migraine. Damnit.

Back to Saiyuki Reload.

Autism Diva
I don't know who sees this, but if you are interested in the autism trial, see this blog for the best roundup day to day, of the trial. She has a lot of links listed that are excellent.

slate.com - True Believers: Why there's no dispelling the myth that vaccines cause autism.
I read this tidy little article today. If I actually found someone who's interest was held on this subject, I'd point them here.

My main concern (well, one) with this trial is that it elucidates a rather frightening illustration of the breakdown of the average person's understanding of not just science, but cause and effect, coincidence (no, there are no coincidences, I think, but that doesn't make every single 'action a' equal the first noticeable 'result 1') and simple reasoning.

I'm reminded of an episode of the Simpsons:

Homer: Not a bear in sight. The Bear Patrol must be working like a
charm.
Lisa: That's spacious [anactoria says 'this should read 'specious'] reasoning, Dad.
Homer: Thank you, dear.
Lisa: By your logic I could claim that this rock keeps tigers away.
Homer: Oh, how does it work?
Lisa: It doesn't work.
Homer: Uh-huh.
Lisa: It's just a stupid rock.
Homer: Uh-huh.
Lisa: But I don't see any tigers around, do you?
[Homer thinks of this, then pulls out some money]
Homer: Lisa, I want to buy your rock.
[Lisa refuses at first, then takes the exchange]

[quote text from The Simpsons Archive

Specious reasoning. Maybe vaccines gave me migraines, too.


curtains of rain
needle the grass
into submission

01 June 2007

Bellydance & Yoga

[this post in progress]

I'll keep editing and updating this. It's a bit of a resource, but also maybe a little pressure/inspiration to myself.

I've danced all my life. Well, most of it. The parts I remember. It got pretty second nature. I'm one of those people who stand with my feet in a V position. I'm standing in first. That's a ballet position. It was hammered into me for nearly 15 years; I can't help it.

But I got disillusioned by mean girls and plagued with headaches so I gave it up for a while. In the course of stuyding yoga I came across Bellydance. Yeah, there were some people I didn't like, but I was a little older and a lot less caring. I've been doing that ever since. Except for a break that has pushed near two years. I really need to change that.

::hip drop shimmy figure 8::

I lost my dancing soul sister and my dad got very ill. Took out my desire to dance. But now I need it, I miss it, I long for it and I'm desperate for it.

These are resources that I frequent. Eventually I'll post a little about each site, because what is dance but poetry in motion?

Bellydance



Yoga